In the dead of night, she crept up into the tower, guards at her heels. Her guards were always at her heels, so much that she barely noticed them anymore, and yet, it seemed wrong for them to follow her up. Months it had been since she'd last been in the dirty tower heights, but they still held the same strange solace. Memories of the last time she'd fled to them brought a blush trickling from her cheeks along her neck, and her hand pressed to her belly, the stirring thoughts not so gentle..but certainly pleasant.
It was warmer than the last time she'd been up here, so many months before .. before it all. How giddy they had been at the thought of their babe, unknown if he was growing at that point..but he had been. It seemed so distant now, yet there was more to the tower, and she felt the weight of memories shroud her as she stared into the clear starlit night. Here, where they'd first talked of leaving, of the deceit that might needs go into it, and yet the King had given his consent without it. Not for the first time, she wondered if they would actually manage to leave for it seemed all plans of departure had always been thwarted.
No, this time they would go...first to Geldenland to deliver the King's regards and the Queen's gifts, and then on to Leugeilean. "I'm going home.." She whispered to the stars, her native tongue tasting sweet on her lips. It had been a kind gift from the King, that brief conversation in the thick language he was unused to. For a moment, a smile touched her lips as the breeze fluttered through the night, and she drew her cloak tighter around her. They would go, and she would stab any ghost in the eye that thought to stop them .. even the Ghost King!
His screams still echoed in her ears, and it seemed to her that the stones of the castle still vibrated with it. That HE could even be afraid astounded her as much as it frightened her. The Ghost King with his visions of things more terrible than she could even conceive, agonies that he could drag through any of their minds simply because he wished it had displayed utter terror. The chill of the night seemed to deepen, and she shifted her cloak, sinking into the warm soft garment as the wind tugged at her bound hair.
Her eyes lifted to the stars again, drinking in the hush of the night. With her guards silent and out of view, it felt like she was the only living thing awake as she surveyed the land laid out before her. She'd always thought it a sweet magic time, but even as the thought rose, she found herself frowning. Magic. The snake had thought it was at the root of the Ghost King's fear, and she was certain he was right. It was words of such things that sent him wailing, but as she thought on it now, she knew not why he was so terrified. True, evils could be perpetuated by magic, but so could good...it was as much a part of life as breathing. The gods bestowed each with different gifts, and had she gone the path she sought, perhaps she would have discovered others in herself. It was a blessing that she had not, she knew now, for Uhtred and his family would not have tolerated it, nor would they find her views on magic anything other than heretical.
Her skin prickled as a wisp of hair brushed the back of her neck, her ears aching with all the screams she'd heard that day. Fingers lifted to brush them lightly as if she expected a thin trickle of blood seeping from them, but there was nothing. After the screams, the silence of the tower was almost a guilty pleasure, and as she lifted her eyes to the heavens, even the worries of her family, ghosts, and magic faded as she began to number the stars. One...two...three...
Wed Dec 17, 2008 11:29 am